Do It Like It’s a Weight on You, or Do It Like It’s Part of the Dance

By Sarah Claire Colling, LMHC, QS | Bungalow Counseling

We all know what it feels like to carry the weight of life—the endless to-do lists, the unspoken expectations, the emotional burdens that pile up without permission. Some days, just existing feels heavy.

But what if it didn’t have to?

What if we could shift the way we move through life, from one of resistance to one of flow?

Ram Dass, one of our great spiritual teachers, gives us this wisdom:

"Do it like it's a weight on you, or do it like it's part of the dance."

At first glance, this might sound like just another mindset shift—but it’s actually a nervous system shift. It’s the difference between being stuck in survival mode and learning how to flow with life instead of against it.

Let’s break this down.

The Weight of Resistance vs. The Freedom of Flow

Think about how you move through your day.

Are you bracing against life?
Tensing up as you go through your responsibilities?
Holding your breath as you push through?

That’s the weight.

When we live from a place of resistance, we carry life as if it’s something to endure, something to get through. Our nervous system stays locked in stress mode, and we move with a subconscious tension that says, “I have no choice but to suffer through this.”

YUCK.

Now, imagine taking the same actions, the same life demands and circumstances but
instead of carrying them like a burden, you move with them—like they are part of the dance.

• Instead of rushing through washing the dishes, you move with the rhythm of the water, the warmth on your hands, the quiet moment of pause.

• Instead of dreading a work project, you bring curiosity into the process—How can I bring ease into this? How can I breathe while I do this?

• Instead of feeling trapped in stress, you imagine yourself swaying with it, moving through it rather than against it.

This isn’t about toxic positivity or pretending life isn’t hard sometimes. No thank you to that.
It’s about how we relate to the experience of doing hard things.

It’s a posture of openness rather than tightness, a shift from fighting life to flowing with it.

How This Affects Our Nervous System

From a trauma and nervous system perspective, this shift is profound.

When we perceive something as a “weight,” our body tightens.
Our nervous system signals threat, even if we’re just answering emails or driving in traffic.

But when we choose to see it as part of the dance, something changes:

✅ The muscles soften—we’re no longer bracing.
✅ The breath deepens—the body signals safety.
✅ The mind stops fighting reality—we shift from stress to presence.

This is what regulation looks like in real-time: choosing to bring fluidity where there was once rigidity.

Real-Life Application: Moving from Resistance to Flow

1️⃣ Pause & Notice

• Right now, check in with your body. Are you tensing up? Holding your breath? Bracing unconsciously?

• This is a sign you’re carrying something like a weight.

2️⃣ Shift Your Perspective

• Ask yourself: “How would this feel if I moved through it like a dance instead of a burden?”

• Even if it’s something simple—folding laundry, getting your child out the door, responding to a frustrating email—imagine yourself softening into it rather than fighting against it.

3️⃣ Bring Rhythm Into Your Movements

• Try breathing while you move. Let your breath guide your actions, rather than just rushing through them.

• If you’re walking, match your steps to your breath—walk with intention.

• If you’re speaking, slow down and notice the rhythm of your words.

4️⃣ Ask: What Would This Feel Like if It Were Lighter?

• What if you brought play into the moment?

• What if you let yourself move as if life were happening for you, not against you?

Final Thought: You Always Have This Choice

Life will keep throwing things at us. The dishes, the deadlines, the disappointments—they’re part of being human.

But every moment, you have a choice:

Carry it like a weight.
Or let it be part of the dance.

Your nervous system will thank you. Your body will breathe easier. And you just might find that life feels a little more alive, fluid, and free.

What’s one thing today that you can shift from burden to movement? Let’s start the dance. 💛